I hope you are having a FANTASTIC WEEK! I am getting to speak with so many of you AMAZING Mamas, and I am so overwhelmed with excitement that you are ready to take action for your Cubs! No work we could ever do will be more important!
This week’s blog topic comes to you from another member of our Champions for Our Children Facebook Group. If you are not a member yet, GIRL, I don’t know what you are waiting for, click this link to JOIN US now!
This question is from Christina and she asks:
How do you get through tantrums especially when others are around and don’t understand so they look at the child differently? How do you keep yourself calm and not wanting to break down?! Boy I remember this feeling back in the day. I remember my daughter started throwing the BIGGEST tantrum in the middle of a Target Store. I tried EVERYTHING to calm her down and nothing worked. I remember FLYING out of that store at WARP speed, crying as hard as her on the way home, feeling so defeated to be “That Mom” with “That kid”.
First off, I want you to understand that tantrum behavior for a child on the spectrum (or a typical child for that matter), is their form of communication. They are using it to meet a need and it serves them VERY WELL. When most kids tantrum, we try to do anything we can to get them to stop, which usually equates to giving the child what they want, which REINFORCES THE BEHAVIOR!!!! The only way to break the cycle is to work through that tantrum no matter where or when it happens.
I know… terrifying… but before your next outing or meet up with friends and family, I want you to think about what it would take to help your tantruming child and decide…
Do you care more about educating your child through an uncomfortable moment or the judgment of strangers/family/friends?
And here is the thing, we do not have control of what other people think, say, or do. People WILL judge, whisper, stare and there is nothing you can do about it. But what you CAN do is make a decision on how you let it affect you. If there is an expectation that these “judgments” will probably happen, then it will help to take the sting out. Also, just like anything new, this is going to be hard at first. My favorite analogy for this is working a new muscle. It will be painful in the beginning, but the more you practice, the stronger you’ll get.
AND something crazy will happen….You will MASTER THE ART OF NOT GIVING A a F#@K! about what other people think!
And INSTEAD of worrying about their judgments you’ll just be saying to yourself… I am in the middle of working through something with my child, if you got a problem with it GET TO STEPPIN.. OR you’ll become so laser focused on working through the issue, you won’t even notice the stink eyes at all.
Till next week my Warrior Moms! Michelle xoxo
P.S. Special Needs Parenting struggles and challenges can look different for different people. If you need personalized support, you are in luck Girl! For a limited time, I am offering a FREE 30 minute 1 on 1 Breakthrough Call where I create a step by step, feasible action plan and blueprint for you and your child for growth and success! Click here to schedule it.